Do-Over

So far 2010 hasn't gone the way I had envisioned it.

Evidence apparent by the fact that this is my first blog post of the year. It's almost February folks!

At any rate, I'm still alive. I'll be updating soon.

Hello (2010) Goodbye (2009)

Tonight as we were driving back home from the dinner we just enjoyed with some friends, I couldn't help but think to myself that it was about that time in the evening where everyone else was probably getting ready to leave their homes to head out to a party, or to a bar downtown.

You know, to celebrate the New Year; inebriated style.

Oh the joys of parenthood. And getting old. And you know, not actually having any plans because you weren't invited to a party or planned to do something sans kids.

But that's okay! Instead I'll pull the blinds in Isaac's room at midnight and watch the fireworks atop Pikes Peak; if I can stay awake!

At any rate, I'd like to wish all my family and friends; near and far a very Happy New Year. I hope 2010 shines bright on you and yours and brings you much happiness and prosperity.

Catch ya on the flip side.....

To all my friends and family...

The joy of brightening other lives, bearing each others' burdens, easing other's loads and supplanting empty hearts and lives with generous gifts becomes for us the magic of Christmas.

W.C. Jones

I wish we could put up some of the Christmas spirit in jars and open a jar of it every month.

Harlan Miller

Every time we love, every time we give, it's Christmas.

Dale Evans

What is Christmas? It is tenderness for the past, courage for the present, hope for the future. It is a fervent wish that every cup may overflow with blessings rich and eternal, and that every path may lead to peace.

Agnes M. Pharo

Christmas waves a magic wand over this world, and behold, everything is softer and more beautiful.

Norman Vincent Peale

It is Christmas in the heart that puts Christmas in the air.

W.T. Ellis

May Peace be your gift at Christmas and your blessing all year through!

Author Unknown

Merry Christmas Eve to All!

I saw this fun little Christmas related meme over here earlier this week and thought that it would be fun to fill out and share.

Merry Christmas Eve to All!

:: :: :: ::

Eggnog or hot chocolate? Definitely hot chocolate

Does Santa wrap the presents or leave them open under the tree? Most are wrapped, some of the larger ones (think gifts for the kids that need assembling) are left unwrapped with a big bow on them.

Colored lights on a tree or white? We usually did all white, but I actually thought about doing colored lights this year. Maybe next .....

Do you hang mistletoe? No. But I should!

When do you put your decorations up? Typically the first weekend after Thanksgiving.

What is your favorite holiday dish? I don't have a particular favorite, I love it all!

Do you open a gift on Christmas Eve? No we don't.

How do you decorate your Christmas tree? Our tree has a hodge-podge of various ornaments on it. Mostly ornaments we've collected over the years as gifts, some that the kids have made, some from our childhood. My favorite ornaments though are our collection of White House ornaments. One year we'll have an entire tree of nothing but White House ornaments, at least that's my goal. Oh! And we put red bows on our tree too with an angel on top.

Snow: love it or hate it? LOVE.

Can you ice skate? I've attempted ice skating only once in my life. I've never had any desire to try again...

What is your favorite holiday dessert? All the cookies!

What is your favorite holiday tradition? Driving around town looking at Christmas lights, baking Santa his chocolate chip cookies with the kids on Christmas Eve.

Candy canes: yum or yuck? Yum.

Favorite Christmas show? Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer

Together Again

A week ago today before I stepped foot outside with the kids to shuttle them off to school, we told them that Dakota would not be home when they returned that afternoon. We made sure they said their good-bye's and then later that afternoon, while they were safely distracted at school, we took Dakota to the vet and let him go.

It's hard to believe that a week has passed already. It's hard to believe that just a short week later, we did it all over again.

But this time with Fargo.

With the kids in tow.

As the days passed since the second tumor surfaced, it was hard not to notice that it was getting larger. There were times when it seemed to be of a discomfort to him, but most of the time he just carried it around, with no concern at all except for what scraps you were going to feed him next.

Early Sunday afternoon he vomited up his breakfast. He then refused dinner. This behavior was something foreign to us because the dog loved to eat. On Monday he ate his breakfast but by mid-afternoon he had thrown it up. Monday evening brought more of the same, he didn't want to eat his dinner and surprised us again with two more piles of where he had gotten sick. We told ourselves that he had eaten something that made his stomach upset.

But I think we knew better.

This morning we made up some rice and soaked it in beef broth to give him for breakfast. We noticed that he was having a hard time expelling waste when he went out with Mickey. He was active and alert, his attitude never dimmed, so for sure he just had an upset stomach.

Deep down inside, I knew better.

By mid-morning he had thrown up the rice. On three different occasions. He was starting to look thin, and the tumor was turning purple from the inside where the skin was stretched to its limits.

We scheduled a vet appointment and took him in.

With the kids in tow.

The vet did an x-ray and discovered that he had a suspicious looking mass, most likely another tumor near the spleen. He also noticed that Fargo had another mass of some sort pushing down on his colon. The vet also suspected that the tumor bulging out from his back was going to ulcerate at any time. His findings weren't completely shocking to us, considering we knew just about two months ago that he had a very aggressive and fast paced type of cancer. It was then that we started to prepare to say our good-byes.

I just wasn't expecting it to be within a week of his brother.

But I think we knew better.

We're all going to miss you too buddy.

Well, except for Dakota.

I imagine that he was waiting for him with his tail wagging, happy to see his brother again.

Fargo 8/3/97 - 12/22/09

Out with the crazy

My house is quiet right now other than the constant hum of my laptop and the clock that's ticking nearby. Occasionally I hear the pitter patter of one of the dogs paws making their way across the hardwood floor. But for the most part it's quiet.

Although in my head things are different. I hear sounds of jets buzzing by, jackhammers tearing up pavement and maybe some fireworks going off in increments. My shoulders are tense, my chest burns when I breathe, my neck has a weird pull to it and my back. It's aching.

The last several months and weeks have been undoubtedly intense. And apparently quite stressful according to my body. What topped it all off though was the raging idiot who thought I cut him off then proceeded to scare the living poop out of me at about 85mph for about 5 miles of highway. Never in my life have I been a victim of road rage but on Wednesday afternoon? It was enough to send my heart into my throat and my fingers to dialing 9-1-1. All because this man thought I had done some injustice to him and his over-sized SUV.

Anyways.

We celebrated two birthday's yesterday; Keven Jr. turned seven and my father turned 74. We had a nice dinner together and then shared an ice cream cake and opened presents. Earlier in the day there was lots of running around like crazed fools trying to tie up loose ends for Keven Jr's birthday, with a little bit of Christmas shopping thrown in and an hour of 'fun-time' at Keven Jr's school holiday celebration. We made a stop by the vet to pick up Dakota's ashes. On Thursday night Isaac and his pre-school class put on a program for their parents and today I took six kids to the movie's in honor of the birthday boy.

The kids are now out of school until after the New Year.

I can't believe Christmas is next week.

I can't believe that 2009 is coming to a close.

I can't believe that my friends and family on the East Coast are buried in over a foot of snow!

I have plenty more to talk about but it'll have to wait until next time. My bed is calling me.